I am a terrible person when it comes to keeping goals. I don't know why but I just either don't fulfill them or I give up on them very quickly. So when it comes to school related goals, I am not any better. I usually write a goal that I want to fulfill and then half way through the quarter or semester or year I will have fulfilled it and forgotten that I have so I have a bad memory when it comes to this sort of work. I guess I'm old in that sense. But when it comes to creative goals and personal goals I have to try extra hard to remember because I created them for a reason, so what did I create them for?
For my personal goals some are really unachievable but to me there hope instead of a goal. One of the current personal goals I have is that I will walk before I graduate either from college or high school but I really want to walk across the stage to receive my diploma instead of wheel across. I really like the fact that I am different but sometimes I feel like its the only thing that is my worst enemy. Because I have this disability I can do so many amazing things that I never knew existed like my artwork and driving before I have a driver's license. I also can't do things that I would love to do like showing my sister the mistakes in her dance routine, performing in the same routine as her, going to dance and meeting a guy that I like. Some people will say that these things don't matter and that people will see me for who I am. It gets harder to believe that even though you want to it just gets harder to have the hope and the drive of achieving normal. And the older I get the more I am missing out on. But I guess I can always live through my sister's life.
My creative goals, however extreme, are always achievable because theres no limit on creativity and imagination. I imagine a lot of things from really cool idea about a piece of artwork to a choreographed dance routine to a song to a blog in my head. I always have a creative wheel turning and it never stops. I read a lot of books that encourage the wheel to turn. Whenever it's serious and realistic book I loose some creativity and imagination because this could or did happen to someone and that scares me. Through many imaginative outlooks the creative wheel never stops when it does it takes everything in me not to cry and weep because there is no hope.
Last Thursday, I did a beautiful, crazy, unfathomable piece of artwork for a paint company. I cannot remember their name or I forgot what it is spelled like. I had to feature their color of the year which was a indigo blue. At the beginning of this painting I was under the impression that their color of the year was a dark purple which drastically changed the outcome of the painting. It turned out to be a beautiful disaster. Like all of my pieces it was unique and unforgettable. There is a video of this beautiful disaster which I will post next. There are really cool pictures and scenes from this video accenting the wheel movements.
For all of you who are new and who don't know me and think I exaggerate a lot I dare you to come up to me and ask to drive my chair. Even though I am a 14 year old, I can still drive this chair better than any other person who has attempted to drive it so far. My parents might be able to drive a van with a stick but I can drive a wheelchair with my mouth. And I will rock this chair until someone in this bizarre universe can prove me wrong or can upstage my awesomeness.
Except the challenge or dare but until next time,